Thursday, March 16, 2006
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Choices
It's amazing - the power of choice. It really works with my kids. H was arguing with her daddy tonight. She didn't want to brush her teeth. (She only likes to brush her teeth for Grammy. :o) The whining/negotiating continued. I walk into the room (can't STAND whining) and say, "H, you have a choice. Would you like Mommy to brush your teeth, or Daddy?" H said, "Daddy." End of argument. She smiled and opened wide. I could give countless examples.
Kids want to feel like they have control just like we do. I don't mind if they think they're in charge as long as they make one of MY choices. :o)
R has watched me use this strategy many times. He's actually tried to use it a couple of times. Usually it ends up with me laughing hysterically. One time, the conversation went like this: "B you have a choice. You can eat your supper or... (insert long pause here)or you can... eat your supper." (You can picture me facing the sink, my back to the action. My body was shaking with silent laughter.) The best part of the story was B's reply, "I'll eat my supper." And she did. :o)
Don't get me wrong, I know arguments aren't always going to be this simple. But "You have a choice..." works really well with my (practically) 2 and 3 year old. It also works well a good deal of the time in first grade. So, while it works, I'm going to enjoy it. :o)
Kids want to feel like they have control just like we do. I don't mind if they think they're in charge as long as they make one of MY choices. :o)
R has watched me use this strategy many times. He's actually tried to use it a couple of times. Usually it ends up with me laughing hysterically. One time, the conversation went like this: "B you have a choice. You can eat your supper or... (insert long pause here)or you can... eat your supper." (You can picture me facing the sink, my back to the action. My body was shaking with silent laughter.) The best part of the story was B's reply, "I'll eat my supper." And she did. :o)
Don't get me wrong, I know arguments aren't always going to be this simple. But "You have a choice..." works really well with my (practically) 2 and 3 year old. It also works well a good deal of the time in first grade. So, while it works, I'm going to enjoy it. :o)
Saturday, March 11, 2006
When did I get to be a grown up?
As I mentioned in the previous post, a bunch of us girls went out on the town last night. I haven't been to a bar in Boston in years (maybe since my bachelorette party)and I certainly haven't stayed out until 12:30 lately.
I had a great time - had lots of laughs and enjoyed my friends' company. But throughout the night, I felt incredibly old. First of all, we drove my green mini-van. (And no B, I don't think renaming it the "party van" helped. :o) But then we went inside the bar. Just seeing the age of people and how they were dressed made me feel OLD!!!!!!!! I know that we looked like a bunch of "moms" walking through the door. :o) It was especially noticeable when we all started yawning by 9:30!!!!!!
It reminded me of one day this summer. I was at the sprinkler park with the girls. I was watching all of these women come in with their kids. Just thinking in my head, I was noticing they looked like "moms". (In my mind that translates as how my mom looked when I was a kid.) It suddenly occurred to me THAT I WAS ONE OF THOSE MOMS!!!!!!!!
Don't get me wrong. My age generally doesn't bother me. I'm not the type to get upset when my birthday rolls around. I think age is all in your attitude, and mine is fairly young. But I'd just like to know, when did I get to be a grown up?
I had a great time - had lots of laughs and enjoyed my friends' company. But throughout the night, I felt incredibly old. First of all, we drove my green mini-van. (And no B, I don't think renaming it the "party van" helped. :o) But then we went inside the bar. Just seeing the age of people and how they were dressed made me feel OLD!!!!!!!! I know that we looked like a bunch of "moms" walking through the door. :o) It was especially noticeable when we all started yawning by 9:30!!!!!!
It reminded me of one day this summer. I was at the sprinkler park with the girls. I was watching all of these women come in with their kids. Just thinking in my head, I was noticing they looked like "moms". (In my mind that translates as how my mom looked when I was a kid.) It suddenly occurred to me THAT I WAS ONE OF THOSE MOMS!!!!!!!!
Don't get me wrong. My age generally doesn't bother me. I'm not the type to get upset when my birthday rolls around. I think age is all in your attitude, and mine is fairly young. But I'd just like to know, when did I get to be a grown up?
Great (but exhausting) day!
Had a really good day today, despite the fact that I'm exhausted from our night on the town last night. :o)
Went to my aunt's this morning. Bunch of my family there. The girls LOVE their cousin Kirsten and their Grammy. I love watching the way they interact with people. Listening to their conversations is the best. We just played and played. When I told Becca she could go in the backyard to play I though she was going to explode. She was so excited, "WE CAN GO IN THE BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (I think we're all ready for spring.:o)
We all packed up for a walk in Callahan State Park. We wanted the kids to be able to wander freely and just run around. Strangely enough when we pulled up to the parking lot there were many police officers. Seems there was a grenade??????? found in the woods. They were getting ready to detonate it???????? Needless to say, we found a new park.
The park we found was great. HUGE open fields and lots of mud! :o) We ran and played and walked and threw the ball - all under the sunshine. I LOVE SPRING!!!! I also love watching my girls laugh. It's magical. They love each other and practically everything around them. They make me incredibly happy. :o)
Hit McDonald's for lunch (Becca's second favorite restaurant), then home for a (much needed nap). We all slept for two hours. (I slept so well that I dreamed I heard the doorbell ring. Turns out my friend Chris came looking to go for a walk, so I DID hear the doorbell ring. Too bad I never answered...:o(
Tonight we went to my school's skate night. Lots of kids that I've taught, most wearing rental skates and wobbling around anxiously. It was great fun to see them all and especially see their smiles. They were very excited to see the girls. The girls were in awe of them. Becca did great skating! She even skated by herself for a while. My back will take a while to recover, but I'm so glad we went.
So like I said - a great day! Although I have to say, I hope tomorrow isn't so great. I think I'd like to stay home and rest. :o)
Went to my aunt's this morning. Bunch of my family there. The girls LOVE their cousin Kirsten and their Grammy. I love watching the way they interact with people. Listening to their conversations is the best. We just played and played. When I told Becca she could go in the backyard to play I though she was going to explode. She was so excited, "WE CAN GO IN THE BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (I think we're all ready for spring.:o)
We all packed up for a walk in Callahan State Park. We wanted the kids to be able to wander freely and just run around. Strangely enough when we pulled up to the parking lot there were many police officers. Seems there was a grenade??????? found in the woods. They were getting ready to detonate it???????? Needless to say, we found a new park.
The park we found was great. HUGE open fields and lots of mud! :o) We ran and played and walked and threw the ball - all under the sunshine. I LOVE SPRING!!!! I also love watching my girls laugh. It's magical. They love each other and practically everything around them. They make me incredibly happy. :o)
Hit McDonald's for lunch (Becca's second favorite restaurant), then home for a (much needed nap). We all slept for two hours. (I slept so well that I dreamed I heard the doorbell ring. Turns out my friend Chris came looking to go for a walk, so I DID hear the doorbell ring. Too bad I never answered...:o(
Tonight we went to my school's skate night. Lots of kids that I've taught, most wearing rental skates and wobbling around anxiously. It was great fun to see them all and especially see their smiles. They were very excited to see the girls. The girls were in awe of them. Becca did great skating! She even skated by herself for a while. My back will take a while to recover, but I'm so glad we went.
So like I said - a great day! Although I have to say, I hope tomorrow isn't so great. I think I'd like to stay home and rest. :o)
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Reading with my girls...
I always knew, even before the girls were born that I would love reading to them. Not a big surprise exactly. I teach first grade. I LOVE to read and I LOVE children's books. Put my daughters and books into one moment - aaaaaaaaah...
We take turns choosing the books. Sometimes they choose, sometimes I choose. They always get to choose what order the books are read. Their current favorites are Ruby and Max books by Rosemary Wells. We read all five of them every night. Becca often reads them with me and I'm so amazed with the questions she can answer. :o) Some old favorites are the Wishy Washy series by Joy Cowley. Haley loves to sit on my lap while I twist her around saying, "wishy washy, wishy washy". She asks for it again, and again. Amazingly, I don't get sick of reading it.
I think my current favorite is "Mama, Do You Love Me?" I read the book in the daughter's and mama's voices. At the end the mama says, "I will love you forever and for always because you are my dear one." When I read it though, I point to Becca and then I add - and you, and point to Haley - are my dear ones. They beam everytime - as if I were telling them I love them for the very first time. I live for that beam. :o)
I love that they love books as much as I do. You can find either one of them at any given part of the day sitting with a book, telling the story of the pictures. I can even hear Becca in her crib at night. She'll open a book and say, "Once upon a time..." What a gift!
I enjoy so much reading to them now, and I don't wish these days away for a minute. But I'm definitely looking forward to all of the amazing literature we'll share as they get older. There are so many books I don't want them to miss. So many stories for us to get lost in together. And then we'll be able to start chapter books... :o)
We take turns choosing the books. Sometimes they choose, sometimes I choose. They always get to choose what order the books are read. Their current favorites are Ruby and Max books by Rosemary Wells. We read all five of them every night. Becca often reads them with me and I'm so amazed with the questions she can answer. :o) Some old favorites are the Wishy Washy series by Joy Cowley. Haley loves to sit on my lap while I twist her around saying, "wishy washy, wishy washy". She asks for it again, and again. Amazingly, I don't get sick of reading it.
I think my current favorite is "Mama, Do You Love Me?" I read the book in the daughter's and mama's voices. At the end the mama says, "I will love you forever and for always because you are my dear one." When I read it though, I point to Becca and then I add - and you, and point to Haley - are my dear ones. They beam everytime - as if I were telling them I love them for the very first time. I live for that beam. :o)
I love that they love books as much as I do. You can find either one of them at any given part of the day sitting with a book, telling the story of the pictures. I can even hear Becca in her crib at night. She'll open a book and say, "Once upon a time..." What a gift!
I enjoy so much reading to them now, and I don't wish these days away for a minute. But I'm definitely looking forward to all of the amazing literature we'll share as they get older. There are so many books I don't want them to miss. So many stories for us to get lost in together. And then we'll be able to start chapter books... :o)
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Well, I've been trying to stay positive, but I'm pretty miserable. Don't get me wrong. I'm very excited (although a little scared) about the new business venture. I'm not happy with teaching right now. I'm very sad that I'm not happy. It makes me so sad that this profession that I am passionate about is wearing me down. I never thought that I would be the one not wanting to come to school. I'm shutting down mid school day. To the point where I don't want to interact with the kids anymore. (Unfortunately, interacting is kind of a requirement. :o)
Part of the problem is I don't really know what's going on with me. Where is this stemming from? I know these past two years have been very challenging. I have had two years with incredibly needy students. That is definitely taking it's toll. The problem is everyone has years with challenging students and if I'm going to teach (and I can't imagine not teaching) I'm going to have to figure out how to deal with it.
One of my students falls apart at the drop of a pin. When I say falls apart - imagine wailing at the top of his lungs, to be heard some distance from the classroom. After these instances, and lately any interaction I have even discussing him, I feel fried. I'm completely overwhelmed, don't know how to help him and can't figure what else to do.
If this were my only student struggling emotionally, I might be able to manage. But I have 5 other children struggling with significant emotional needs.
There is a piece of my brain that understands that I can't be superwoman. There is a small piece of my brain that understands that there is only so much that I can do. Unfortunately, a HUGE part of my brain doesn't agree. I think that's a huge part of my problem. I continue to expect myself to do everything and do it all well (yesterday no less). I know this is true because as I write it my eyes are filling with tears. (Always an indicator that I've struck a chord.)
So as my school day goes on, I'm thrown many challenges. For each challenge, I expect to provide a solution (yesterday :o). As the challenges build, my emotions run high. I feel overwhelmed. In addition, normal things happen. I forget to photocopy something, we run out of something, I only meet with one guided reading group... I beat myself up because it's not done. Internal conversation, "How could you not have thought of that. Of course it needs to be done. Now you're not doing x,y, and z..." "You haven't addressed ________, What about __________, You need to do something about __________, _____________ is not getting what he/she needs..." These "productive" conversations continue to run me down so that I feel even more overwhelmed. Suddenly, my brain can't take anymore. I shut down and I don't want to teach anymore. Yuck.
So what do you do about something that you know you've created, but you don't know how to fix?
My first plan of action is to focus on what I am doing well. (Can you tell I'm not very good at that? :o) Maybe I'll stop once at lunch, and once at the end of the day to write myself a note. (Pathetic, but maybe what I need.)
I also know I can apply Flylady to this somehow. I just need to be creative. Baby steps...
Anyway, once again, thanks for listening. Writing this was therapeutic. That's really why I started this blog (other than copying B :o), I get so much out of writing and rarely take the time to do it.
Thanks again. :o)
Part of the problem is I don't really know what's going on with me. Where is this stemming from? I know these past two years have been very challenging. I have had two years with incredibly needy students. That is definitely taking it's toll. The problem is everyone has years with challenging students and if I'm going to teach (and I can't imagine not teaching) I'm going to have to figure out how to deal with it.
One of my students falls apart at the drop of a pin. When I say falls apart - imagine wailing at the top of his lungs, to be heard some distance from the classroom. After these instances, and lately any interaction I have even discussing him, I feel fried. I'm completely overwhelmed, don't know how to help him and can't figure what else to do.
If this were my only student struggling emotionally, I might be able to manage. But I have 5 other children struggling with significant emotional needs.
There is a piece of my brain that understands that I can't be superwoman. There is a small piece of my brain that understands that there is only so much that I can do. Unfortunately, a HUGE part of my brain doesn't agree. I think that's a huge part of my problem. I continue to expect myself to do everything and do it all well (yesterday no less). I know this is true because as I write it my eyes are filling with tears. (Always an indicator that I've struck a chord.)
So as my school day goes on, I'm thrown many challenges. For each challenge, I expect to provide a solution (yesterday :o). As the challenges build, my emotions run high. I feel overwhelmed. In addition, normal things happen. I forget to photocopy something, we run out of something, I only meet with one guided reading group... I beat myself up because it's not done. Internal conversation, "How could you not have thought of that. Of course it needs to be done. Now you're not doing x,y, and z..." "You haven't addressed ________, What about __________, You need to do something about __________, _____________ is not getting what he/she needs..." These "productive" conversations continue to run me down so that I feel even more overwhelmed. Suddenly, my brain can't take anymore. I shut down and I don't want to teach anymore. Yuck.
So what do you do about something that you know you've created, but you don't know how to fix?
My first plan of action is to focus on what I am doing well. (Can you tell I'm not very good at that? :o) Maybe I'll stop once at lunch, and once at the end of the day to write myself a note. (Pathetic, but maybe what I need.)
I also know I can apply Flylady to this somehow. I just need to be creative. Baby steps...
Anyway, once again, thanks for listening. Writing this was therapeutic. That's really why I started this blog (other than copying B :o), I get so much out of writing and rarely take the time to do it.
Thanks again. :o)
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