It's amazing - the power of choice. It really works with my kids. H was arguing with her daddy tonight. She didn't want to brush her teeth. (She only likes to brush her teeth for Grammy. :o) The whining/negotiating continued. I walk into the room (can't STAND whining) and say, "H, you have a choice. Would you like Mommy to brush your teeth, or Daddy?" H said, "Daddy." End of argument. She smiled and opened wide. I could give countless examples.
Kids want to feel like they have control just like we do. I don't mind if they think they're in charge as long as they make one of MY choices. :o)
R has watched me use this strategy many times. He's actually tried to use it a couple of times. Usually it ends up with me laughing hysterically. One time, the conversation went like this: "B you have a choice. You can eat your supper or... (insert long pause here)or you can... eat your supper." (You can picture me facing the sink, my back to the action. My body was shaking with silent laughter.) The best part of the story was B's reply, "I'll eat my supper." And she did. :o)
Don't get me wrong, I know arguments aren't always going to be this simple. But "You have a choice..." works really well with my (practically) 2 and 3 year old. It also works well a good deal of the time in first grade. So, while it works, I'm going to enjoy it. :o)
5 comments:
I started using it after watching how well it works with your girls. I find that it works really well also.
And, it still works with 3rd graders!
I'm glad I have more time to count on!
It is amazing how the choice thing works with kids.
Personally, I think it's the control that they are after.
Thank goodness we can give them the illusion of control!!
:)
Ah, one of the universal tricks of mommyhood! It still works great on my almost 5-year-old.
Once we were on a plane, and all I had to drink was water. So his choice was "water, clear water or unflavored water." I can't remember what he chose, but the people behind us were sure cracking up!
Thanks for sharing K. I like that one. :o)
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